Ok here's the deal. On Black Friday I helped someone I know order something as a Christmas present for their wife. I won't mention names since the person it was for might read this. Anyway, so I placed the order on Amazon.com and a few days later I got an email from Amazon with a shipping date, shipping carrier, package contents, shipping address, tracking id, the works. The item was being shipped via FedEx care of the other person we'll call him Bob. So after I got the shipping confirmation and was charged money from my account, I figured the package will arrive at Bob's place of shipping and I don't need to worry any longer as he had paid me for the order already as well.
Flash forward two weeks. Dec, 15th. I receive an email from Amazon which looks like another one of their spam things so I archive and don't really look at it. I get at least one every few days and I usually just ignore them unless they say "IMPORTANT!!!" or "SHIPPING!!!" or "CONFIRMATION!!!" This one says, "Information from Amazon seller blah blah". Nothing jumping out at me. Like I remember the dumb seller's name. Its not even for me and I didn't really buy it from them I bought it from Amazon. Shouldn't this email be something more like "HUGE NASTY PROBLEMS WITH YOUR ORDER!!! OOOH YOU'RE GONNA BE MAD!!!"? Anyway, so today something prompted me to send Bob an email just to make sure he got the package that should have gotten there a week ago. I'm just making sure but I'm not expecting to get his response saying he didn't ever get it. I do a search on my emails where I find the email I mentioned which is telling me the following:
Hello from Amazon.com.The seller of the following order has sent you a message. You can reply to this e-mail to correspond further with the seller. The message text appears below.Order ID: blah blah 2s and stuff* Item: 1 of blah blah blahSeller's e-mail: orders@stupidseller.comIMPORTANT: Amazon.com's A-to-z Guarantee only covers third-party purchases paid for through our Amazon Payments system (via our Shopping Cart or 1-Click). Our Guarantee does not cover any payments that occur off Amazon.com including wire transfers, money orders, cash, check, or off-site credit card transactions.-------------- Begin seller message ---------------------Hello,We recently discovered that the item you purchased is no longer available. I sincerely apologize for the inconvenience. Unfortunately, the vendor provided us with a tracking number that was entered into your order therefore your order was in fact charged. This does not happen very often and again, I do apologize for the inconvenience. I can help you find a similar item (at a discount) if you would like or we can go ahead and refund your order in full.Please let me know what you decide!Thank you!Stupid CS person-------------- End seller message ------------------------
You may be wondering what my favorite thing about this email is. Is it the fact that I already got a message saying my order was shipped? Is it that the seller tries to blame the vendor for my being charged for a product that isn't actually for sale? Is it the fact that they even had an item list for sale that isn't for sale? Or could it be the fact that the seller waited two weeks to contact me and tell me that they didn't really ship my order? None of those in fact. My favorite part is the fact that it is now my responsibility to contact the seller to tell them to give me my money back for something I paid for and they did not give me.
"Would you like your money back since you aren't getting a product? The ball is in your court, now I'm going to forget about you unless I hear back from you by February 26th, 2010."
What do they think I'm gonna write them back and be all calm and forgiving?
"Oh its ok. I totally understand that these things just happen. I was so appreciative of your email and the fact that you said 'Thank You'. The fact that you added an exclamation mark really tells me that you meant it. In fact I'm so impressed and understanding that I'd like to buy 9 other things from you and you can go ahead and keep my money too. I'm just that kind of person."
I haven't left any seller feedback yet because the story isn't quite over (and I'll be sure to update you as well) but here is the email that I have prepared to send to them. I may not send it but it felt great writing it.
Subject: Where is my stuff indeed?I got a message saying you no longer sell an item I already ordered and paid for. I got a message with a shipping date confirmation and a tracking number two weeks before you finally decided to contact me to let me know you didn't actually really ship anything. This is ridiculous. I would like my payment fully refunded. Honestly the fact that I even have to write this email and tell you I want a refund feels kind of ridiculous. I would have expected something more like a message saying that I was already refunded my money instead of something asking me if I want my money back or not since I'm not getting the item I ordered. Gee let me think about that one... Why was the item even listed for sale if you don't sell them?You're NOT Welcome!(Notice the use of capslock and exclamation marks for emphasis...)Brandon Burruphttp://sanpaco13.blogspot.com
And just for fun, this is the kind of email I actually kind of expect to get when this kind of thing happens.
Subject: IMPORTANT MESSAGE FROM STUPID SELLER WHO MESSED UP YOUR ORDER FROM AMAZON!!!Dear Brandon (valued customer),Oh man we really screwed up. We just figured out that you were charged for something that we actually no longer sell. We are so sorry for our mistake and especially that it took us so long to catch it and we are willing to go to all lengths to fix it. We have already credited your account with a full refund but would like to also offer you an alternative option to what you ordered. Because of our mistake we are willing to send you one of the following items free of charge and with free overnight shipping.(list of items almost exactly like what I ordered goes here)Please let me know which one you would like. Your business is extremely important to us. You can contact me directly at my personal number 888-555-5555 anytime of the day or night. Feel free to call me collect as well. Again I can't say enough how sorry I am for the inconvenience and I hope you have a better experience with us in the future.Sincerely,Person in charge of orders at Stupid Company (not some peon idiot who doesn't really care about your order and is just earning money for night school)
